The story of a little bird.

Ever since having a whole new life, this little bird has not been able to fly at all. It doesn’t even know how to flip its wings. So many factors affecting it from being able to fly… This little bird has been on the ground for a long time. Recently, it has broken its wings. It hopes that someday some other bird will fly over and teach it how to fly again. But this little bird knows – that in the end, it itself has to learn how to fly despite its condition, it has to recover its wings as soon as possible, after that taking flight to the blue sky above, with the other birds, with the clouds…

While recovering, it looks up to the sky, praying for any other birds with sore wings, hoping they’ll be able to fly high once again…

The bird looked at one of its wings. Either it is hallucinating, or some scars on its wing have begun to heal…

I like this picture...

This picture, really describes my feelings right now. I really like scenery photos, you know? If you would have noticed, most of my pictures in my previous blog posts had all been scenery photos, even the title picture above. Haha! Well, what can be said~ I love scenery photos, they resonate with me in a way which words cannot describe... =) Oh, anyway, moving on to this photo, sorry for the alignment problem, I got that from a photo URL so I can't do any adjustments. So, thanks to below!

If you are highlighting this blog post, it's either you thinking that my blog post is too empty, or you know me very well.

I have made my thoughts my prison. It's no longer about love issues, it's no longer about my studies...

It's about life.

I like this picture very much... tribute from ragsphotography (c) at this website link: 51searcher.com/music-search-singapore-singapore

People keep telling me, "Plan for the future!! If you fail to plan, your plan will fail!"

Some tell me, "Appreciate today, work hard for tomorrow!"

Some also tell me, "We live for the present, not for the past or for the future!"

Which is true? Which is false?

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Enjoy the picture!! ^^

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I am really unstable in my thoughts. Is it because I'm weak? Or because I don't understand myself, just like the rest?

Yet, deep down my heart...

If you can't see tomorrow which is within distance, how can you see the future which is beyond distance?

A $20 that belongs to me. =)

I earned AUD20 yesterday night!! My very first salary! ^^

Oh right, I'm really bad in updating you guys. I just took up a part time job in New Zealand Natural ice-cream kiosk in Carousel Shopping Centre, Perth. My very first part time job!!

Well, not really a part time job yet. I have to undergo some training to prepare for that. I'd started my training since last Tuesday until this Thursday night. In short, I had been training for 3 days only. However, I really learnt A LOT within these 3 days. If you give me the right ingredients, I can make fruit juice, milkshake, smoothie, bubble tea, even the cappuccino you drink in Starbucks. =D Hey! Stop giving me that disgusted look! I can ensure you that the drinks I make taste great, okay? xD

Here is where I work!

I really had a thrill working here. Multi-tasking and serving customers, it's just like those games that you play on your laptop, Diner Dash? Burger Rush? Cake Mania? Yeah, those games. I had to admit that for a clumsy person like me, my techniques aren't good enough. Not doing enough household it seems. Scooping a scoop of ice-cream could take me up to 5 minutes. My worse mistake: the customer wanted a chocolate thickshake. After blending the mix and pouring it out, watery liquid came out of it. From thickshake till milkshake. >__<

Sorry if I had offended any customers for the previous days. >__<

I guess I'll be working there from now on. Hopefully I can get some decent cash to spend back in Malaysia. So, before I go, let me show you... how to make... CHILLO! Chillo is something similar to the cappuccino in Starbucks. I made my very first, yesterday night!

First of all, prepare 220ml of fresh milk. Add a scoop of ice into it.

Secondly, take a big scoop of New Zealand Natural's Cookies 'N Cream ice-cream and dunk it in.

Then, add two spoonfuls of vanilla powder.

Blend it!

For this machine, set the blending speed as 4.

After blending is done, take it out and pour it into a cup. Add some whipped cream on it and pour some cookie powder on the cream.

Serve!!

I was drinking my own Chillo and it tastes really, really good. It makes me feel like a small kid. Haha. But I have to pay for it though, 10% discount for staffs. Sorry if some of the pictures are blur. Iwas secretly taking pictures of it without my boss knowing it, so no time to focus with my Sony Ericsson 2.0x mega pixels camera. xD

Tomorrow, I'll be going to a musical festival (or concert), called One Movement Music Festival! The ticket price is AUD99, but all Murdoch students and staffs can get them for free! From 12pm - 10pm, there will be combos of performances by bands and music groups, but I don't know any of them. They're mostly Australian bands. Oh boy, it's gonna be one hell of a crowd.

Ok, that is all for today's update! For my friends in Perth, be sure to visit me every Monday, Wednesday and Thursday shopping night! I'll make a drink just for you! But sorry, you must pay, because the boss won't let me make it for free.

Till the next blog, see ya!!

I've been there.

Among all of my frequent readers, I'm guessing that only 3 of you knew where I had been yesterday night. One of you who had been with me ever since I was born; one of you whom I missed a lot and one of you who was there with me yesterday and will find this post quite unpleasant.

My dear friends, this blog may surprise you, because it is almost impossible for a guy like me to do so.

Everyone, I went clubbing yesterday night.

Now now, don't start getting excited and encouraging over my first time. Neither should you feel upset or antipathy over my choice of going clubbing. Yesterday, 3 of my friends were celebrating their birthdays on the same day. After an Italian dinner and some change of outfit, we went to Northbridge of Perth City, finding a nightclub to go party. Northbridge is one of the most 'happening' place in town due to most of the night clubs, bars and pubs located within it. During the night, teenagers around will all gather here to party and enjoy themselves and get drunk. Sometimes, fighting occurs. One of the most dangerous times to be in Northbridge is Friday night.

Don't worry, we came back home safe and sound, thankfully.

There was some hassle in between; I will not share the story here, it's a long one; due to that we were led to this place - The Court.

The Court is a hotel pub which organizes clubbing nights every Friday. To be granted entrance to night clubs, you must either provide your passport, or a Proof of Age card to verify that you are not under age (18). This place really was happening!!! Everyone was dancing like crazy over here! There was 17 of us that night, many of them showing off their moves on the dance floor. Oh, this pub is also open to homosexuals. That's right. I saw 2 guys kissing passionately at a corner. Unbelievable, yet not surprising to me. It's not because I'm gay that's why I find it okay, it's because too many unpredictable things are happening around me, I have been immune to these incidents. After going to The Court, we went to Paramount and clubbed until 3 in the morning before we went back home.

Many of my female friends were dancing and enjoying themselves, as if they've never did it before.Everyone was having such a good time, dancing widly, screaming out loud, not giving a damn about anyone else. I was there dancing and shouting with them as well. Don't worry, I never hooked up with any other girls during clubbing, let alone drinking or smoking. The reason why I joined my friends to clubbing night yesterday was only because I wanted to experience how fun clubbing is and to understand why people love night time activities such as these. After that night, I finally understood why.

I feel both happy and sad - for those people who chose to club, drink, smoke, have sex for the sake of that temporary happiness, that temporary escape from reality - at the same time.

It's not up to me to decide not to go clubbing anymore, because one day when I start working and if clubbing is involved, I don't have a choice. However, I have made up my mind. As long as free will can be taken into consideration, I will choose not to join them. Don't get me wrong, last time, I was rejecting clubbing sessions with a closed mind. Now, my mind is wide open, yet my stand remains. Besides, I'm not a clubbing type of person right from the start, remember?

Temptations... to refuse for the sake of sanity, or to receive for the sake of desire?

I just saw some of my friends' (Murdoch) blogs respectively. Looking back at their past posts, I realized that they too are having coping problems. The same problems that I had faced months ago. About leaving all your loved ones behind and proceeding to another country. The distance just gets further and further.

I finally found out that I still have some social issues. I tend to kill a happy mood by saying things that I'm actually not supposed to. XD

Right now, I'm under confusion. A part of my mind tells me, "Don't give a damn about how others think about you! Live your life the way you want it to be!"

But another part of my mind tells me, "Socialize! Be accepted by others and don't make them think you're an anti-social!"

I buy the anti-social point, but not the 'accepted by others' point. If I want to be accepted by others, that means I have to change myself and restrain myself from doing stupid things. That's not me anymore, right? XD Still dealing with the confusion~

So, before I end my post here, I just want to let all of you know... Whether you're in KDU, Murdoch or anywhere else in this part of the world. If you're still having problems with adapting, coping or getting used to a new environment...

I am one of them. You are not alone. =)

GG

Before you start asking, 'GG' is a short term for 'Good Game', commonly used in DotA matches when the game ends and you want to compliment the whole progress of the game. After all, despite all the flaming and swearing during the game, we'll all shake hands and admit defeat in the end. =)

There are hundreds of games that I've played before, varying from different consoles, some that I couldn't even recall. The classic Super Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog series, Metal Slug all series, Golden Sun, After Dark Games, Resident Evil... etc. However I'm just a regular gamer, not a hardcore gamer. Until today, I prefer First-Person Shooting Games rather than RPGs. RPG just take too much time for me and I prefer games that end fast so you can play the next round instantly. Here, I'll show you my most frequently played games of all times.

My friends, welcome to my world of gaming.

Double-Kill First Blood!

This game is one of my all time favourites, Defence of the Ancients, DotA. DotA is a strategy Player VS Player hero defence custom map game from the real game, Warcraft III and has become immensely popular within the youth. DotA led itself to various competitions, forums, blogs and had been well received by gamers worldwide. I'm not as pro as the other players out there, but I enjoy playing it a lot with the AI Maps. These maps contain (programmed) computer players to fight you if you're playing alone. But I like this while playing with your friends best. ^^ DOTA ROCKS!!!

Next up is an old-time favourite by most senior gamers out there, Counter Strike. I'm very sure you've heard of it. Do you still recall phrases like "Terrorists Win!", or the most popular "Fire in the Hole!"? It's all from this First-Person Shooting Game. (FPS), one of the first FPS LAN games to ever exist. I don't play this quite often, I'm more hooked up on DotA instead. There is also this game series called 'Call of Duty'. It's far by my most favoured FPS game ever. Especially the 4th game - Modern Warfare. Too bad I can't make any screenshots out of it because I don't have it with me. But trust me, it will blow your mind away. =D

When I was in secondary school, it was during the VBA trend. Visual Boy Advance is an GameBoy Advance emulator in PC so you can play Game Boy Advance games in your computer. I am an addict to the Megaman Battle Network and Megaman Zero series. In fact, I'm actually a Megaman fan. You want a talk about it, feel free to seek me out. =D All Megaman series in GBA are 2D-action games, although the graphics is crappy but they are really good games indeed.

In KDU, there is only one game... Lord of The Rings: Battle for Middle Earth II.

LOTR: BFME2 is a strategy game based on the LoTR trilogy saga. There are 6 factions you can use, ranging from Legolas in Elves, Aragorn from Men, right to Sauron from Mordor. My favourite faction is ISENGARD! My KDU buddies and I were loyal fans to this game. We had Player VS Computer (PVC) and PVP matches. With a wide variety of factions, units, special powers and strategies, this is one game I will always remember... because it built friendship and companionship between me and them...

Do I play any musical/rhythm video games, such as O2Jam? Well, not O2Jam, but Stepmania.

Stepmania is an open source and cross-platform rhythm video game and engine. It is a PC version from the famous DDR (Dance Dance Revolution). I could play difficult levels after playing it for 3 months, so I picked up the skills very fast for this game. This is the ONLY game that'll make my friends say "Holy Shit! What the F*ck is that? That is impossible! How did you do it?!?!" while I'm playing in front of them and Stepmania actually boosts my confidence in gaming. Haha, curious of my abilities in Stepmania? If you have the chance, watch me play it and be amazed. ^^ Oh, if you have the skill and feel doubtful, you can challenge me too if you want. =D Stepmania is a free software!! Download Stepmania right here!!

In Perth, I stumbled upon this game called Adventure Quest Worlds.

AQW is a MMORPG (Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game) flash game and it is slowing getting attention to more people around the world. Because it's a flash game, it does not require much computer memory, so although there are thousands of people playing at the same time, your computer performance won't be affected. =) I'm also hooked up on this game because it updates real frequently. If you are interested, you can check out the Adventure Quest Worlds website here. It's quite addictive really. XD

Never heard of the games above before? No worries, I still play some games that you all play, from a popular social networking site.... Facebook! Pet Society, Typing Maniac, Word Challenge, you name it all.

Years ago, I got addicted in playing computer games. I rarely had the chance to play other game consoles, such as PSP or NDS or X-Box and I don't have any of them, so computer is my only companion in gaming. The reason people chose to play games is, well, for the fun of it of course. There no more other reasons why we play games, it's just for entertainment purposes, nothing else, right?

Actually, there are.

Come to think of it, after being here in Perth, I started to wonder why do I always lock myself up in my room just to play games. When I was a boy, I played games for the rush of excitement, the sweet taste of victory when you defeat the last boss... YEAH! That tastes good!!! Throughout the years, I only play when I have nothing else to do (or when I'm slacking). Usually I play to follow the storyline. But right now, I just feel that - the reason is no longer any of the above anymore.

I'm escaping from reality.

It was really hard for me to admit the fact that I'm growing up - fast. Everything just happened so abruptly till I rarely had the chance to catch my breath. Within 3 months, I had been transferred to Perth, all my thoughts about spending my time in KL flushed right into the drain.

I have a girlfriend that really changed my life, she made me realize what true love is and because of her, all my worries and insecurity were gone. But not more than 2 months being with her I had to go to Perth and start a long distance relationship immediately. Now, to be able to meet each other, the time interval is not within hours or days, but months...

I had real understanding buddies, they are the ones that truly touched me and made me realize who I really am. They are the ones who supported me right to the end and gave me the opportunity to be Roxanne's boyfriend. They are the ones who taught me what real friendship is and how to maintain it. I owe to them a lot, but I had to go to Perth, leaving all my friends there. Even though there are online advantages, but there are feelings that no comments can express, emotions that no texts can show...

Of course, my family's financial issues. The currency here in Perth is almost 3 times the currency in Malaysia. They have a really heavy burden on their shoulders just to send me to Perth. I can't ignore the fact and keep spending money like using water anymore. I have to start finding part-time jobs to get expenses for my own.

All these new facts and responsibilities rushing right into my brain in one go, it really is a heavy burden for me to bear. Everything just - happened so quick for me. I wasn't fully prepared to face any of these. I'm growing up too soon.

That's why I keep playing games - to slow down the growing process, to recall those happy naive memories... to get my mind off the burden...

To escape.

Believe me, it is not easy. I called up the best adviser in the world to me, my dear mum. She chuckled on the phone when I told her my problem. She just told me this:

" Jonathan, you are thrown onto a fast lane, because you can drive fast. Growing up fast is a good thing! Time passes whether you want it to or not, you might as well accept the facts earlier and PREPARE sooner! You know in your heart that you can do it. =)"

I was once again amazed and gratified to her - my best advisor in the world.

So guys, listen up. You can't hide from your problems forever. The road is straight, it's far better to look ahead than looking behind you. What problems are you having right now? Ugly appearance? Bad friends? Loneliness? Family issues? Whatever the problem is, it doesn't matter. God placed you in that situation because He believes that you can deal with it. You're in that position because you have the power inside of you that can cope with the situation and stand out strong! Come on, you believe in yourself right? Now, get up, stop thinking negative and rise up to the challenges - because YOU can do it!! I will start thinking optimistically from now on! Wish me luck!

Before I end this post, do me a favour. For those reading this blog, I would really appreciate it if you could at least post a comment, to share your feelings about this, or maybe just to say 'hi' and encourage me. The comments will really mean a lot to me. ^^ If you would like to post a comment but don't have a Google account, just click on Comments ---> Name/URL. Typing your name will do, you need not type anything in the URL. Thank you very much~

Finally, my last piece of advice! I'm not gonna tell you to stop playing games or doing whatever you like to do. Just remember: 'Whatever you do or play, be sure it's not an act of hiding yourself from reality.'

GAME ON!

I learnt a lesson

I finally got the answer to the blog post below. ^^

It was 2 weeks ago, when I went to my mum's friend's place and met this Singaporean teacher. His name is Chris, married and has many years of teaching experience. We had a conversation and I started telling him about my difficulties in triggering my study mode back to ACTIVE instead of DEACTIVATED. That was also when I learnt that he was a lecturer himself. XD

He told me, "You cannot just rely on your interests and motivation in order for you to study! As a student, studying is YOUR JOB!"

I was struck. So it's my job... Maybe I knew this all along, but i just needed the right person to tell me. Haha, that always happen to me. =p

He suggested me to GO TO CLASS NO MATTER WHAT. He taught me something that I think I should share it with all of ya:

"You cannot choose to skip class just because you think you don't believe what will be taught to you. Going to class helps you understand the keywords and the main points to the current chapter you're learning at that day. Come on, nobody expects you to understand everything or the whole chapter in just 1-2 hours!!!"

"SELF-READING is the most crucial part of studying. It's all about exploring and understanding it by yourself. The teachers/lecturers/tutors/instructors are just there to guide you. In the end, it's all up to yourself."

Don't worry, mum, dad, sis, Roxy and my dear friends. I have finally understood the importance of studying. (I can't believe I only knew it until this very day. >__<) My study mode is triggered back to life! From now on, if I want to study, I believe I can MAKE me study for real. Yay! ^^

However, my study mode now is like all of you - STANDBY because I'm lazy at the moment. =p

Next blog coming up - the reason why I play computer games!!! Be sure to check back in, that is going to be a good post. =)

Oh by the way, is the song in my blog nice? Give me some opinions plz~~~